👋🏾 Hi friends!

October is a heavy month on the emotions (and the wallet) for me 😬 As I mentioned last week, we celebrated my wife’s birthday in Italy and this weekend we celebrated mine. In a week or so we’ll be celebrating our anniversary too.

Milestones like this are a great way to reminisce and, as you’ll soon see, I certainly took the opportunity to do just that.

In this weeks Off Balance, I’ll be chatting about:

⌛️ Office hours with Aarish and 45 lessons learned over 45 years
🧮 The importance of the modern day CFO in tech
☯️ Getting away from black and white thinking

Check out this weeks Primer where I get to know Julio Martinez and his journey into building Abacum the FP&A platform for mid cap businesses 🚀

Also if you have any feedback or if there’s something you’re desperate to see me include, just reply to this mail or ping me online - I’m very open to conversations.

Give me a follow on LinkedIn, Twitter (do I really have to start calling it ‘X’ soon?), Instagram and drop me a note :)

(If you are trying to connect with me on LinkedIn, maybe read this post I wrote and make sure to start your request with “Off Balance” and, more importantly, tell me why you’d like to connect 💪🏾)

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Now let’s get into it.

How can did I add value?

Maybe it’s the fact that I just turned 45.

Or maybe I just started formalising the things I have always done.

But over the last few weeks, I’ve been approached by a bunch of people asking for my advice on everything from personal growth, through to raising investment, to advice on taking the next steps in their career so they can move from finance ops into more strategic CFO roles.

And so, in order to really try and open my door to as many people who might want to get my help as possible, I’ve opened up Office Hours so folk can book a time directly in and chat about whatever is on their mind (for free!). If you’re someone that wants to explore an idea, get some help on your startup or your career, just Pick My Brain via this link 💪 

In the meantime, as I crossed the threshold into my 46th year on the planet, I reflected on some of the lessons I’ve learned over the years.

Here they are for posterity:

1. Play long term games with long term people.

2. Balance is where you find it, don't let others dictate your path to fulfilment.

3. Define your own success.

4. If you're not learning, you're not growing.

5. Your issues as an adult reflect your pain as a child.

6. Forgive yourself first.

7. Back yourself, always.

8. Don't wait for permission.

9. Know when to bend the rules, think before you break them.

10. Don't remove obstacles from your children's path, it teaches them life isn't tough.

11. You can only fail if you don't get back up.

12. Love yourself first, if you wish to love others.

13. You can't force serendipity, but you can create an environment for serendipity to flourish.

14. Listen. Then talk.

15. Read widely, learn deeply.

16. Purpose doesn't pay the bills, do what you are good at and you'll find purpose emerges.

17. An eye for an eye and the whole world turns blind.

18. Cherish this moment, right now.

19. Your future is unwritten, it is up to you to write it.

20. Marriage takes work, every day, having someone to share your life is a blessing.

21. If you learn how your parents grew up, you'll understand how you were raised.

22. Sorrow comes from attachment, detach yourself from attachment, find joy.

23. If you cannot manage your health, you cannot manage anything else.

24. Move daily. Lift heavy things. Stretch and strengthen.

25. Cold showers won't manifest your success, but they will set up your day the right way.

26. Learn to breathe. To still yourself.

27. Create periods of boredom, creativity happens when the mind is not busy.

28. Your legacy is not what you've done, it's what endures in people's memories.

29. Learn to say no, it will free you in ways you cannot imagine.

30. Surround yourself with people smarter than you.

31. Formal learning is not for everyone, some people need to find their own path.

32. If you have an addictive personality, channel those addictions into positive habits.

33. Learn to sell, whatever else you learn.

34. Understand how businesses work, how money circulates, what leverage can do.

35. Celebrate when your children succeed, support them when they don't.

36. Money is never the object, time is the object. Money is the means by which you get it.

37. Find leverage in your life. Make it a force multiplier to achieve amazing things.

38. Compounding is not just something that grows your money.

39. If you haven't found yourself, start with where you are right now.

40. Get a therapist. Thank me later.

41. Don't let your ego get in the way.

42. Give to others freely, with no expectations.

43. Family always comes first.

44. Write often. When you write you learn.

45. I likely have ~1,825 weeks left on this planet, I want to leave not having regretted one moment.